When the zombie plague hits, you can be sure that our hospitals are going to feel the brunt of it as people get tested and issued with green or red wristbands. Mindful of this, BZF sent an operative undercover this week to see how well our local hospital was functioning and checked if it would be up to the pressure of a mass zombie infection. It was a quick 5:00am dash to the emergency centre, and well, the initial report is not pretty.
Let’s face it, what is it with those white hospital gowns! We commend the use of practical natural fibres like cotton but surely they could have some designer colours? Some prints at least. How about adding a pocket for your iPhone? Why do they use tie fastenings, have they not heard of Velcro?
Seriously the style is archaic and in desperate need of a fashion upgrade. And the whole “put it on backwards” thing has got us stumped. Did some half drunken medical intern start this as a practical joke and somehow it has become a Standard Operation Procedure? Walking around with your bum hanging out – really.
We believe, like everything, it is a Government conspiracy. Like tobacco plain packaging it is a psychological trick to reduce the pressure on our hospitals. We can image Miss K’s views on this…
Miss K: “Honey I’m feeling dizzy and my skin is turning grey.
Mr K: “Let’s get you to the hospital and checked out!”
Miss K “What, no way! I wouldn't be seen undead in one of those hospital gowns. You can just lock me in the garage. Oh and sharpen up the axe just in case”
Bite off more than you can chew