Do the survey!

A big plea to our followers and fellow zombie enthusiasts.

Please complete this simple online survey to help us better understand the zombie apocalypse. 

Click here to do the survey

There is a serious lack of zombie research available and we here at BZF are keen to understand what the zombie apocalypse would feel like. While the survey may seen strange, it is based on accepted research methodology that we pinched from a major research company. Your results will be used to visualise what the Zombie Apocalypse experience would be like.

The bad news

We really, really, really wanted to offer a promotional giveaway to one lucky person who had completed the survey. However further investigation of the Gambling Laws here revealed this would be a Trade Promotion Lottery and that we needed to apply for a license and pay a hefty fee. Even for a prize only a few dollars in value. The chances of us getting a criminal conviction for giving away a coffee mug is slim, but we didn't want to risk it.

The good news

In Queensland it is legal to own a slingshot. Oh and an individual can run a Trade Promotion without needing a license! So an individual who wishes to remain anonymous (thanks mum) has stepped in to offer a giveaway on our behalf. So....

Awesome giveaway to one lucky person

As an incentive, someone in Queensland is giving away this limited edition, BZF coffee mug to one lucky person. (we are on a tight budget okay). This stylish mug features Cheryl the Zombie in glorious technicolor. On the other side is the quote "Kylie's fashion tips are to die for" a tribute to Mrs K, creator of BZF. 

A prefect gift if your name is Kylie and you are an aspiring fashionista. Not so good if your name is Steve. Never-the-less this is a awesome item valued at a amazing A$5. If you want to be in the chance to win it, just include your name and email address in the survey. If you are feeling paranoid, leaving your details is purely optional, so don't let it stop you doing the survey.

What the heck, this person in Queensland is feeling really generous and will also throw in this trendy keyring. Perfect for the holding the keys to your zombie apocalypse bunker.

details, details, details

The one lucky person to receive these treasured items will be selected randomly from those who completed the survey and provided an email address and name. If the one lucky person happens to live outside of Australia we will rummage down the back of the sofa to find the extra money to cover the additional postal costs. The survey closes on Sunday 28 December 2014 so don't delay. The lucky person will contacted by email to arrange delivery. This giveaway is organised under the Queensland state gambling laws Category four, promotional games (trade promotions). My mum reserves sole and final judgement as to all matters concerning this giveaway. Enough with the legal stuff, go do the survey!





Bite off move gambling legislation that you can chew.

Mr Rimsky 

Zombie Apocalpse House

Somewhere in a Japanese rural village there is a house I want to visit. It is an authentic Ninja House built over 300 years ago. Looks like a farmhouse but you actually enter a place of tricks and traps that puts James Bond to shame. There is a hidden revolving wall panel, a concealed ladder, a handy underground tunnel escape route, a secret alcove hidden behind a hanging scroll and other cool interior design features.

They run tours there.

So I got thinking about making your own Zombie Apocalypse House. One with a few tricks of its own. Here are few ideas I have collected from people.

Looks like a few planks resting against the back fence but in fact it is a ramp into the yard next door. Good for a fast get away, especially as zombies don't have a great sense of balance and will find it hard to follow. Also great for using the neighbour's pool when they are on holiday.

This fence backs onto a reserve and is fairly well hidden by the shrubby. There is a gate in that ramshackle fence and judging from the slightly worn trail it gets used occasionally. Obviously a nice escape route when the religious fanatics come door knocking.

Here we see a how plants can be use to add protection and secrecy to your escape route.  Zombies will find it hard getting through these bamboo hedges. With some more fertilizer and pruning this will be a impregnable tunnel hidden from prying eyes.

Don't neglect the veggie garden. Here the use of large concrete garden beds has created a series of barricades and choke points that you can use to defend your house should the zombies break in. You can use retaining walls and large art sculptures in a similar way. Don't forget to string up some trip wires for fun.

If you have the cash to flash and the room, create a hidden alleyway beside your property by installing a fake inner fence. I have seen this used on several properties. 

This one is pretty luxurious in terms of space. It can act as an escape route, rally point or extra car park.

Providing it is not raining, drains can be a wonderful resource for those plagued by an abundance of zombies. It is also cheaper than digging your own bunker. Even if you can't fit your family in there you can use it to cache your survival supplies. Or at least keep your beer cool.



Bite off more than you can chew.

Mr Rimsky

Calling All Beavers!!

Stay out of the water, board up your windows and doors because everybody’s favourite furry little creature has received the zombie treatment and these blood thirsty beavers are lurking in the darkness waiting to gnaw away at your good bits (see below).

Welcome to Zombeavers, the flagship for a new era of zombified animal horror movies (Squirrels is on the way).  So you know when people say that a movie is so bad that it’s good?  Well Zombeavers is certainly one of those movies!  From the creative opening credits and the super authentic 80’s inspired music, I was hooked and ready to see just how bad these naughty beavers could bite.

Naturally with a strong ‘R’ rating for depictions of blood, sexing and at times poor acting, Zombeavers does a marvellous job of not taking itself seriously at all.  Yes the predictable plot of mildly attractive ‘20 somethings’ stuck in a cabin making radically stupid decisions is a tired story that is all too familiar but strangely this movie hurtles along at a quick pace and keeps you entertained throughout.

There is no news of a Zombeavers 2, but frankly I could watch approximately 8 installments worth of zombie beavers terrorising hapless pretty people who have no idea how to outwit or outsmart these blood thirsty ‘beasts’.  Maybe we need to start campaigning now with Zombeavers 2: Beaver Fever, Zombeavers 3: Beaver Forever, not to mention the 4^th installment that serves as a reboot Zombeavers Vs Zombears – as you can see the possibilities are endless and perfectly horrendous!

Bite you later

Mr Vitamin G 

Apocalypse Hal: How to use a survival kit

And you thought the hardest thing with using a survival kit was unwrapping the Mylar space blanket! Welcome to the world of modular, purpose specific, survival kits.

Every Day Carry

These are essential items that you carry on your person wherever you go. For many this would be a pocket knife, cigarette lighter and a few other small items.  However some people can get quite creative and carry enough weapons and equipment to arm a small nation. 

Minimalist Survival Kit

Similar to Every Day Carry are the Minimalist Survival Kits. These are often packed in a small tin (Altoids mint tins are very popular) and slipped into a pocket so you can carry it with you at all times. Being small and lightweight these kits are limited to a bunch of small items that may help you.

Get Home Bag

Seeing most of us have a full time job, there is a big chance a zombie apocalypse may happen while you are at work. However, turning up at a staff performance appraisal at work with a Rambo style survival knife strapped to your belt may be frowned on by your employer. 

To get around this some people have a Get Home Bag stored at work. The aim of the Get Home Bag is to help you get from your workplace to home and so contains more practical items than your Every Day Carry or Minimalist Survival Kit have. This could be a change of clothes, practical footwear, a torch, water, a few food bars etc.

Car Kit

Along the same lines you can carry a similar survival kit in your car. Or even several different kits. For example you may have a Get Home Bag that you can take with you if you need to abandon the vehicle and walk home. Depending on where you travel you may also have equipment in case you get lost or stuck in a snowstorm. Some basic car essentials like a toolkit, blanket, first aid kit, water and food may all be part of what you carry.

Bug Out Bag

These bags are becoming popular and you can buy ready made bags online, including zombie apocalypse specific bags. The aim of the Bug Out Bag is to contain everything you need to get you through the first three days of a disaster. Hopefully by then help would have arrived. Naturally these bags can get fairly large and heavy so are usually packaged up as a backpack in case you need to leave an area on foot.

Bug In Bag

So a Bug Out Bag is designed in case you need to leave your home in a disaster. What if you decide to hunker down in your home until help arrives? Well you will need, you guessed it, a Bug In Bag. This contains essential items for staying put in your home. As you do not need to physically carry it can be packaged up in a plastic crate or a series of crates. Sure you will also have all the food and gear in your house but the Bug In Bag allows you to get your hands on those emergency chocolate bars quickly.

Bug Out Vehicle

If you are going to flee your home, walking is going to be dangerous and slow. So it is worth having a Bug Out Vehicle to travel in. Naturally you want to customise this vehicle. It could be a four wheel drive with bigger fuel tanks, an electric winch and extra cup holders. Of course it doesn't have to be a car and some creative people use boats, motorbikes, pushbikes, planes and even pack goats.

The Bunker

Now if you really want to be prepared you will also want a bunker or safe house set up. This is where you retreat to should you need to flee the zombies. Remote cabins in the mountains seem to be popular, seeing it is based on the idea you want to get away from heavily populated areas. This bunker naturally needs to be fully equipped with food, water and other equipment to sustain you long term.

As you can see, buying shares in a company manufacturing survival gear is not a bad investment.


Bite off more Mylar than you can chew.

Mr Rimsky

The Zombie Combat Manual

"For far too long, many have made light of eliminating the undead, with tragic consequences".

Well it is about time I did a book review that was a bit more zombie related. The Zombie Combat Manual by Rodger Ma (along with The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks) is considered a must have text on the subject of the zombie apocalypse.

I must admit I found this book scary. It appears zombie outbreaks have been occurring everywhere around the globe and no one told me. And worst, at the time of publication, "contact has not yet been reestablished with Australia". I really must watch the news more often.

First up, let's discuss the most vital aspect of any book, the illustrations. For me the quality of the artwork are what make or break a book. Luckily there are a lot of excellent semi-realistic illustrations in this book to help you master the techniques of battling the undead. The zombies look suitable gruesome.

I also found the combat reports added a wonderful depth to the subject matter. The people interviewed are varied, giving a very broad perspective on the zombie epidemic. Take Dr Judith Ballantine, Child Psychiatrist, who's latest book "Mommy's Different Now", aims to help guardians educate toddlers on coping with the loss of a parent due to infection.

Speaking of toddlers, there is also a section on Child Protection, examining the various ways to carry children in zombie infested zones. Being a fan of Lone Wolf and Cub I was disappointed Roger didn't expand on how you can customise your baby carrier with armor plating, spring loaded blades and other useful weapons. Not to mention benefit of riding strollers downhill, like a skateboard, to escapes zombies.

It is certainly a comprehensive manual and maybe too many pages are spent on the various weapons you can use. Then again, if I have to make a choice between a viking axe, a zweihander and a naginata, I now know which to grab (Viking axe). Great to know if the zombies rise up while I'm touring a museum.

It is easy to see why this book has become a classic. I'll definitely be heading down to Bunnings this weekend to stock up on landscape shovels and nose plugs. 


Bite off more that you can chew.

Mr Rimsky

Apocalypse Hal: Zombi Lifecyle

I know what you are thinking, didn't I do a Zombie Lifecycle the other week? Yes but was for a zombie while this week it is for a zombi.

So what is a zombi?  Here is a very short summary.

It all began on the mountainous island of Hispaniola in the Caribbean Sea. The Eastern half of the island, now the Dominican Republic was originally colonised by the Spanish while the Western half, now the Republic of Haiti was under the French. It was in Haiti that the zombi first started to appear.

It also involves Vodou, one of the more misunderstood religions. It is quite a sophisticated religion and centres on the loa, or divine spirits, which can posses worshippers in a trance like state. Vodou houngans act as priests while bokors are Haitian sorcerers who practice dark magical arts.

Let's say an aspiring bokor sorcerer is getting frustrated at keeping their home clean but those commercial housemaids cost a fortune. What would be useful is some free help. A zombi would be perfect.

So the bokor finds a suitable candidate and uses powerful drugs, most likely tetrodotxin from the pufferfish, to paralyse the victim. Hopefully the local doctor mistakes the paralysed patient as being dead and it's off for a quick burial. The bokor would then return after the funeral to raise the corpse from the ground and carry it away.

The paralysis starts to wear off and the victim comes back to life. By skilful application of more drugs and a bit of convincing, the bokor makes the victim believe they had returned from the dead to be a faithful zombi slave. You may think that would be a bit hard for the victim to accept but some people will believe anything. Also the expectations of Haitian society and peer pressure from the other zombi would cause the drugged person to believe they must be a zombi too.

The bokor can now focus on expanding the family sorcery business while the zombi dutifully takes out the garbage and collects the mail.

In the Haitian French language people raised from the dead in this manner are called "zombi". As the English like to fiddle with things they added the “e” on the end giving us the word "zombie".  

The zombi is specific to the Haiti culture and they don't eat brains or infect people. But they are real, or at least were. I also have no idea what a bokor looks like so I based my on some of the traditional vodou imagery. These days bokor probably wear suits and have business cards. 

Bite off more pufferfish than you can chew.

Mr Rimsky

Button Up!

Hey BZF lovers, this week we are going to get in touch with our inner gizzards and talk about showing our feelings.  Say what???  Well let’s put things in perspective, so each week seems to bring different calendar events such as ‘International Happy Day’ or ‘Wear Pyjamas at Work Day’.  Don’t get me wrong, I am a strong believer in supporting charities and displaying your advocacy via a colourful ribbon, but what about coming out to the world as a loud and proud zombie fan?

One day at work a fellow walking dead enthusiast and BZF fan brought in some amazing badges that completely took me by surprise.  Sure, I have a few zombie tees (buying some more soon!) but apart from that I don’t have much else to put on display!

I will say that badges for me are something I associate with the High School Student Council, Girl Guides and Sarah Palin – So they don’t really excite me all that much, but these little babies are cute, humorous and gosh darn it just sooooo fashionable!

Check out some of my favourites below!

I know it’s not always the best idea to go around labelling people, so why not badge them instead with these gorgeous little circles of joy! 

Bite you later

Mr Vitamin G